Transitions and Purpose

I believe that life orients around us and that our inner state directly reflects that which is inside back onto the world. Our ability to integrate this vital life force and unlimited creative energy (shakti) is greatly dependent on how we care for ourselves and the inner alignment of our beings. Body, mind, and spirit.

And sometimes, things get off balance. This is a post on transitions, gaining awareness, returning home, and healing. I hope you enjoy.

Recently, I completed a big chapter, a massive transition in my life, and my intention is to share here with you how I got through it and hopefully offer some tokens for you if/when you find yourself moving through a big life transition.

But first, (of course) I need to tell you a little backstory. I completed graduate school with a Masters in Mindfulness-based Transpersonal Counseling from Naropa University. I also teach yoga alongside my new psychotherapy practice, and *I thought* I would have this transition in the bag. (I’m sure you can guess where this is going). But I mean, the last day of school is usually a happy and fun thing right? At least that’s how I remembered feeling.

Well… it’s a yes. And.

It just so happened that this transition was a little bit different for me than I was expecting (spoiler alert, sorry/not sorry). I had a few different things going on for me.

1. Even though I am a yoga teacher, my body was pretty wrecked after 5 years of intense study completing my MA (and also my BA right before my graduate program, hehe). So long story short here, my body really needed time to heal, to let go of the stress it was carrying from years of papers, discussion posts, countless hours of reading (and more reading iykyk).

2. Emotionally, I had gone through a contemplative MA program in Transpersonal Counseling Psychology. While this was my choice entirely, it’s hard to say if there was really anything left to process after going through a grad program which required one to really look within and be as reflective as Naropa called on us to be. (Note: I truly would not have had it any other way, I firmly believe this inner work is necessary to be an effective transpersonal counselor—and, 3 years+ of this…whew! I was tired to say the least).

3. Spiritually, I also felt a bit tattered. I went into this big life transition (school) with high hopes—I still have them, but I’ll get to that part later. I thought I might meet the love of my life while in grad school, I thought I might become pregnant by the end of my program, I thought a lot of things—timeline related—that just didn’t really pan out the way I thought. And so, as my therapist put it, I kind of unknowingly made a deal with the universe that didn’t exactly pan out the way I expected.

I had tried to date while in grad school but it was simply too much for me to manage. I had gone from and years and years of monogamy to dating, what a concept. This long-term relationship gal (me) found herself in a string of 2-3 month flings, similar to that of my semester system—LOL. And I did learn a lot through this process as well, let me tell you! And, whew in more ways than one, I was feeling pretty ready for this chapter to close.

Right at the tail end of my program, literally a month away from finishing, I met someone that thought and really felt actually might stick longer than my semester long flings I was used and perhaps even turn into something… because—in my mind, we clicked, we met in person (something that feels rare these days in the culture of online dating), and the semesters were ending in my world. So duh, right? Spoiler alert: wrong.

Anyway, all this to say that when I exited grad school, a dating relationship (that perhaps I projected onto a bit with my own expectations, but we’re all human), and returned to my self and my new life sans school etc., I sort of didn't exactly know who I was anymore. Even though on paper it might look like I have my purpose all figured out, I felt pretty lost and even a bit depressed.

So, I did what I knew how to do. I returned back to myself. I started taking better care of my body first… eating better foods, with local organic ingredient, consistently cooking more home cooked meals, practicing yoga, meditation, and breathwork more consistently (for myself, rather than simply with my students—yoga teachers, we can talk more about this another time). And really just letting myself (and my body) be, decompress, and rest for the first time in a long time. I also started going to a barre and ballet class! to try something new and be challenged physically.

Emotionally, I dove deeper into my personal therapy work… I let myself cry and process my emotions (again, probably for the first time in a long time, because finally I had the time).

And I started listening to inspiring intuitive messages from different practitioners who I follow to allow my brain to reorient around meaning and living a life of purpose. Also, thankfully, my best friend is a hypnotherapist and I already told her that she could slip little helpful brain changes to me anytime, so that always helps.

It’s clear to me now:

BODY + MIND + SPIRIT

When we can live in alignment here, truly magical things can happen. We can reflect our innate divinity into our life in limitless ways. Our relationships flourish because we, ourselves, are flourishing from the inside out. We feel more connected with our community and giving back in the world. We can truly live our dharma (purpose). It is SO beautiful to watch this unfold.

That’s why I created a new program called Living Well: Body, Mind, Spirit Medicine. A 3-month long container designed to shift you back into sacred alignment for living a balanced life through Ayurveda, mindfulness, and hypnotherapy. You can check out the details here if you’d like to learn more.